The Championship is in The Mustache
10. Jun, 2010 
3 Comments
Congratulations to the Chicago Blackhawks and the Fans that have stuck with them for more than a decade of bullshit. You deserve to drink from Lord Stanley’s Cup! Enjoy! An to you bandwagon fans (myself included) if you watched and supported this team through to their cup victory you may celebrate as well, just don’t act like you have been watching hockey forever.
But now on to the real article. The Championship is in The Mustache, that is right. There is an algorithm for winning in Chicago.
Coach + Mustache = Championship
Championship caliber coaches need facial hair to win in Chicago. I know it sounds stupid right? I laughed it off myself, but then I got to thinking about it, and well history tends to repeat itself so let’s have a look back upon the more recent Championships in Chicago.
Mike Ditka
Chicago Bears 1985 NFL Champions
Kick Ass Mustache!
Phil Jackson
Chicago Bulls 1991, 1992, 1993, 1996, 1997, 1998 NBA Champions
Kicks Ass Beard & Mustaches throughout all of them.
Bonus points for MJ mustache too.
Ozzie Guillen
Chicago White Sox 2005 World Series Champions
Manscaped Mustache and Goat.
Joel Quenneville
Chicago Black Hawks 2009-10 Stanley Cup Champions
Killer mustache
As they say the proof is in the pudding, and the championships are in the mustaches. Now with that said there seems only one logical thing left to do. Convince Lovie to grow a mustache or push for a new hire. My suggestion…Tom Selleck.
Thanks to Adam P. for suggesting this topic to me a few weeks back. I felt like I couldn’t post until the Hawks had brought back the cup.
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I was wrong, the Hawks won. Didn’t think they could do it. But the proved me won.
It was a good game. I really thought they blew it in the 3rd by letting Philly score, but they pulled it out in OT. Good game, sucks to lose on your home ice like Philly, but to party on someone elses has to be a good feeling.
As for Lovie, forget about the Stach. He won’t do it cause he believes that is beneath him.
Whatever he does, he better win a playoff game or his ass is out of here! And I am starting to believe that it should be!
Excellent article, beautifully researched. Impeccable grammar…couldn’t have done it better myself. Wait. I could’ve, but it was still very good. Something for Lovie and Loopie Lou to consider.
DA DAT DA DA DAT DAT!!!!!!